Identity Crisis!

Everything has a place and a place has everything!

In the past 25+ years, perhaps there have been 2 days that I can remember not making my bed (and I just may have been hospitalized those two days, just saying). Same goes for picking out the next morning’s clothes (so I of course have also done this for the kids since day 1 which has caused Owen to completely freeze in fear when I suggest he pull out an extra shirt for the diaper bag; he may not be aware, but I know he has no idea where those are kept).
I am sure there is some sort of psychological explanation (or control freak label), but organizing chaos keeps me sane. In my SBS life (ie corporate), during interviews I lean in to hear how people describe their stress coping mechanisms “Long walks! Talking with my husband! Deep breaths! Happy hour! (of course we don’t usually give the job here but I do want to high five the complete honesty!). My legs wish that I managed stress with a long run, but instead I most often turn to a closet that needs re-hauled or a counter that requires a long scrub (okay, most of the time with a glass of Cabernet-high five!) but no qualms that it is the lazy susan that is begging for a re-stacking that is the true motivation...

So it is the weekend before the LOA and I am interviewing my SuperMom friends.:
“Ladies, so trying to prepare…what is the wardrobe for SuperMom career?”
“Are you serious??”
“Yes-like is it more yoga pants, jeans, leggings? Or does it perhaps depend on the day’s activities?”
“OMG Sam, you are such a freak!”
Okay, so not getting a lot of insight here. Next stop is the US Weekly guilty pleasure, The Just Like Us: Moms Section. Hmmm…stilettos at Monkey Joe’s? In my wildest dreams, would I even own a Carolina Herrera frock much less wear it to the playground? Another strike out for guidance.
The only near experience with this is maternity leave…and I don’t think anyone wants to see that one pair of yoga pants being trudged out again. Standing in my closet on the first LOA Sunday night, I feel an overwhelming rush of anxiety and just a few tears brewing in the very back of my eyes. Though I am not sure of much, I am pretty certain that the LOA dress code does not readily involve the 15 suits, 30 pairs of heels, or wrap dresses in every color surrounding me. What to do? I feel a little shaky but I am throwing caution to the wind and climbing into bed without a damn thing laid out. 
So three hours later and still not asleep; holy hell-CEO Mommi has just crumbled the process flow map and is a hot mess. Thought this was the right road but terror is itching my skin and I sincerely wonder who is this CEO Mommi without the high heels?